Tuesday, 8 September 2015


Today my littlest started school.

My constant companion over the past years, my buddy, my go-to coffee date.

My lovable son.

It's a very bittersweet feeling.  Sending him out into the great big world.  Letting someone else be with him all day long.  Wondering what he's up to.  Hoping he's okay.

I think those thoughts are always stronger with the baby of the family.

But - I am so excited for him.  He can grow and flourish, and begin something new.

And he gets to do what his brother has been doing for years now - and that's pretty enthralling for a 4.5 year old!

Yes, I admit - I am also excited for a little more quiet time.

(And to end my career as a short-order cook for a very demanding customer... ha!)

I'll miss you, O.  But have fun, little man - the world is ready for you!

Friday, 21 August 2015


Three years go so fast.

Yet oh so slow.

There's been a lot to process, a lot to acclimatize to, a lot of deep breathing and trying not to cry.

But there's also been a lot of hope, a lot of promise, and still - a lot of support.

To everyone who helps me fundraise, gets involved, spreads the word, makes me laugh or listens to me rant - thank you.  You are part of the reason I feel accepting of my MS.

Getting diagnosed with a chronic, life-long disease is never an enjoyable experience.  Never something you revel in along the way.  But, for me, it has been the most forceful catalyst to understanding who I am.  Knowing that self right in the middle of my being.

I don't know why I mark this day.  Why I remember.

Maybe I need to let go of some loose emotion.

Maybe I need to do something special for myself.

Maybe I just need to pat myself on the back and say, You got this.

Monday, 17 August 2015

Crusin' to End MS

Each year, the MS Society of Canada partners with A&W to raise money to support people living with MS.  To provide funds to assist with research, equipment, support groups.

That list goes on.

This partnership has raised more than $6 million dollars.

Money that I have seen directly help me.  And money that has impacted anyone living with MS in Canada.  Anyone who is involved with the MS Society of Canada.

These fun, interactive events are a great way to spread awareness.  They get people talking. And the word spreads fast.

Other great examples are Dairy Queen's support of Children's Miracle Network Hospitals on Miracle Treat Day and London Drugs' sponsorship of Pink Shirt Day.

Each year I embrace this amazing sense of community.  I eat my Teen Burger with gusto.  And heck - I usually throw in another donation too.

Because this is how fundraising moves forward.

We support.  We help raise money.

On Thursday, August 27th, $1 from every Teen Burger sold at A&W will go directly to the MS Society of Canada.  But, if that's not your thing, you can still donate at any location or online.  And join the fun - many locations have classic car shows, games, raffles, and entertainment.

It's great fun and a great cause!

Sunday, 19 July 2015

Summertime boys

That right there, my friends, is the look of pure joy.

It's hard to ignore that kind of energy.

It becomes a mesmerizing life force of its own - sucking you in for more.

And it's even more poignant for me, this summer, as we returned to the family summer house.  The house where my Nanny spent her time, cherishing each moment with her family.  Taking us under her wing each and every summer.  Teaching us the importance of love, life, and genuine friendship.

She passed away a few months ago, but we finally got to bring her ashes home.  That brings me a lot of peace.

And I can feel her spirit continuing. 

Through anyone who sits and enjoys the view.  Or dangles their toes into the water, even for a moment.

Watching these two makes me genuinely believe this.  I can see it in them.

Life does carry on.  In many ways.

Friday, 26 June 2015

I'm melting...

Or in medical terms, Uhthoff's Phenomena (heat intolerance).

Many people with MS experience a drastic sensitivity to increased body temperature.

Demyelinated tissues in the central nervous system can be very sensitive to even small increases in core body temperature, which results in nerve conduction delays or even conduction block.

This sensitivity can be exasperated by exercise, hot baths, emotion, fatigue, fever, or for me - Summer.  Ugh.

Any MS symptom can appear because of this, with the most common being blurring of vision after activity and overall physical weakness.

Avoidance is the best defense (yeah - tell that to my kids).

For now, I'll use my cooling neck tie (so ugly, but really helps), take lots of cold showers, and make room in the freezer for my entire self...

Only two months to go...

Thursday, 25 June 2015

On Motherhood, at year-end

Sometimes I yell.  Sometimes my shoulders are tight with stress. 

Sometimes I have to take a deep breath and count to three.

I am mostly exhausted. 

And sometimes cranky.

And I never get enough sleep.

But you know what?  It's worth it.  Every moment, however tedious, tiring or repetitive they sometimes can be.

Because these tiny creatures are truly awesome.

And there are days, like today, where you stop just that little bit longer to look at your child's face.  To try and understand them just that little bit more. 

To see them as real people.  Important people.  People growing up in what seems like an instant.

Being proud of my boys is an understatement, for sure.  They have both accomplished so much this school year, have pushed past obstacles and uncertainties, and have come out on top.

I couldn't be a prouder, more sentimental Mom as I am right at this second.

(maybe that's the lack of sleep from a 4am kid nosebleed or the 6 Timbits I just scarfed).

Onwards and upwards for these two guys!

Preschool Graduation

Last day of Grade 2

Monday, 1 June 2015

MS fast fact - dysaesthesia

Or for me, the creepy crawlies.

Dysaesthesia, which means an abnormal sensation, can occur in any area of the body, depending on where central nervous system damage has occurred.  And comes in many forms - pins and needles, tingling, numbness, burning, wetness, crawling, itching, electric shock.  Not to be confused with loss of sensation, or reduced bodily sensation.  These are all common in MS.

Other than tingling and numbness, which are my biggies, the skin-crawling sensation is a common one for me.  It's not permanent, but it always affects me in the same area.

It starts on the tip of my nose and spreads across the left side of my face.  It feels like thousands of bugs are crawling across my skin.


Then it just stops.

And reappears whenever it pleases.

It's a good time to practice my nursery rhymes, I guess...