Now that "the big reveal" has happened, so does the influx of emotion. Face-to-face encounters over the past days have been prefaced hurriedly by my shouting "NO tears, NO hugging!" Normally I love a good cry and an even better hug, but Sarah-with-the-ugly-cry has surfaced, and she ain't pretty. She does much better in private. And sometimes, that is how this process is going to have to work for me - at least for now. Sure - I am writing about this, and sharing it with whomever cares to read it. But my lovely Samsung laptop provides the best invisible layer of protection that stops the ugliness in me from materializing.
But please, don't pretend this isn't happening to me. Don't tell me "I'll get used to it." Tell me a joke (reducing stress is key!), take me out, write me an email, tell me what's going on in your life. MS rule #1: no treading on eggshells - talk to me, ask me things. MS rule number #2: please refrain from the "at least it's not cancer" ideology. I do, of course, understand that this could be a lot worse. But also, this was not something I was high-fiving my pals about. "Yes! I have MS!"
There will always be something worse, for each and every one of us. Always.
If you want to read more about the lovely goings-on of MS, this is for you: