Monday, 31 December 2012

A yearly goodbye

I went to buy a bottle of bubbly for tonight and, while paying, was asked what my resolutions for 2013 are.  I stood there, silent and stunned.  A million thoughts ran through my head.  I could have had an hour long conversation with this man - pouring out every last thought and detail - right from the bottom of my soul.  Everything that has happened in 2012, and why I will be so glad to see it gone.  Instead, I told him I try not to make resolutions.  They turn life into something "achievable" rather than something to enjoy.

That being said - 2012 was a very difficult year for me.  It has brought a multitude of huge changes in my life.  Changes that will never go away.  Changes that have been excruciating and confusing to accept.  I don't anticipate that the dawn of a new year will make those emotions disappear.  It is impossible for them to simply vanish.

But 2013 will bring a new start.  It will not be the year I got diagnosed.  It will not be the year my concept of me got flipped on its axis. 

So, tonight, with my bubbly, rather than welcome 2013 with a list of resolutions, I will excitedly, yet probably with tears, say goodbye to 2012.   My hope for 2013 is one of health and happiness.

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