Tuesday, 16 April 2013


Why is parenting with a chronic illness just a little bit harder?

Let me just say I will never be president of the PTA. 

I will never make 300 cupcakes for my kid's birthday party or for a school bake sale.

Mostly, it's exhaustion, but there is also this niggling sense of mental incapability that can become consuming.  Consuming simply because having a life-long disease becomes a chore. 

It's hard to not put your kids first.  Sometimes you have to say no to that party invitation, cross your fingers you don't become no-fun-mom, and move on.

It's frustrating when your kids don't understand.  I know it's important to explain MS to them in terms they understand.  And at a level appropriate for their ages.  But how does that work?  I actually heard myself once saying to Jack "Mommy's brain just can't do that right now."  To a 5 year old, what exactly does that mean?

There is never a quiet moment.  My boys are my life, but I tell you, they are the loudest and busiest creatures I have ever encountered.

There is more guilt.  Yes, more guilt than regular Mom-guilt.  And wife-guilt.  You do fewer baths, fewer bedtimes, you usually don't go to the park after 4pm.

And I know that one day, most likely, they may resent my health issues.  They may be embarrassed, frustrated or disappointed.

But it's okay.  I know they don't care who makes the cupcakes.  They don't care if Mommy has no make-up on today.

I can only hope that what they go through now, with this, helps turn them into sensitive, caring, empathetic men who value life, love, and family.

This makes me laugh!

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